What Really Grinds My Gears – 13

You know what really grinds my gears – people who have forgotten how to work doors.

I’m talking about doors in public buildings that are not locked. It’s either push or pull, right? Yeah, no. It’s apparently not that simple.

There are 4 doors side by side. 3 of them are closed and only 1 is open. Everyone needs to line up for the open door. They have forgotten how to open the other doors. These are public doors! They are in a subway station. Why do you think they are locked? Or do you think they just don’t work? I’m not lining up to go through a door. There are very few situations where lining up to walk through a door is normal.

One, if it’s a revolving door and there are no other doors to the building. Obviously, you cannot rush a revolving door, though sometimes that’s fun. Line up, take your turn, and do not miss your opportunity. There is a system, figure it out and walk through.

Two, if you are in an airport. I don’t care what door in the airport either. It could be the door to the washroom. Don’t run. There is never a rush at the airport. Line up and take your turn, etc. The minute you start rushing the doors you might as well start screaming “I DEMAND A CAVITY SEARCH” because it’s bound to happen anyways.

Three. I can’t even think of a third. There is no reason to line up to go through a door other than the two reasons above. If there are other doors, use them. Open them. If pushing doesn’t work, try pulling. I’ll bet it opens.

Why don’t people hold the doors anymore? This isn’t even chivalry, it’s common sense. You figured out the door, great. Now leave it open for the next person. You don’t necessarily need to stop to do this. Just push it wide as you’re leaving it and hope the next person catches it and does the same.

And what’s the deal with automatic doors? Just because there is a button doesn’t mean you need to depend on it. Open the door using your hand and a bit of muscle, then push the button to keep it open. Isn’t this common sense?

The button is for people in wheelchairs, people with strollers, people juggling a bunch of bags, people on crutches, etc. If you’re able to open the door, then do so. Why do people get to the door, stop, look around for a button, press the button and then wait dramatically for the door to open before going through? Do you realize the commotion you have just caused? What did you do before the button existed?

What about traffic? Here the general rule is ‘stick to the right’ as goes for driving. So here I am walking on the right and I go for the door on the far right which just happens to be open already. People coming towards me need to use that door too? Why? Because it’s already open? Listen, you lazy ass, there are three other doors, pick one. You are now walking into on coming traffic all for the sake of a door that’s already open.

I can be sure that the door to your house or apartment does not have a button and does not stay open 24/7. Since I see you, I know you’ve left your house and you aren’t a hermit. If you figured out how to walk through THAT door, why can’t you do it here?

You know when you see a door and it says “PULL” and you push anyways? Ok so you’re a bit slow, or maybe having an off day. It’s ok, we all do it now and then. But if pushing doesn’t work, give it a pull. I don’t understand why you are continuing to push. Even if you don’t know how to read, there is a 50/50 chance you’ll get it right. Don’t stand there looking stupid waiting for the door to open on it’s own. Take initiative or stay home.

And I KNOW that I’ve mentioned the laws of door elevators before. This applies to subway and busses too. If I’m trying to get out, let me out. Don’t barge your way in. Where are you going to go? No where. Let me out, then you move in. That’s how it works. If you don’t move out of my way, I’ll show you how. I guarantee you won’t like that.

It’s common sense really. Door or no door. If you see someone coming, move out of their way. If you see me coming, don’t hesitate. I’m becoming less tolerant and I’ll put you in your place. No shame. You’ll learn some day. I hope.

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