I Smell Another Rant – 5

Did anyone else hear about Elaine Hess? She was awarded eight million dollars when her husband died of lung cancer. “Stuart Hess died in 1997 at age 55 after decades as a chain smoker.”

Ahem, what did he think would happen? So here he is smoking away, filling his lungs, body, and the rest of the room with filthy smoke, he can’t NOT know the consequences. Even in the 90s, I am positive they taught ‘stop, drop, and roll’ during the fire safety lesson in school. Smoke rises, and you’re to stay close to the ground to avoid inhaling too much. THIS IS TAUGHT IN SCHOOL!

Ok let’s say that Stuart didn’t go to school, or he didn’t go to a school that teaches this. Let’s say he’s never heard of the ‘stop, drop, and roll’ rule before. What part of him thinks, ‘hey, smoke is good for you’? Would he run into a burning building? Or stand in front of it? That’s ok, if he died, his wife would sue the Fire Department for not putting the fire out before he happened to walk by.

Elaine claims that this tobacco company was misleading people for years. Are you kidding? Did they come out and say “smoking is good for you, tobacco tastes like cherries”?

No they didn’t. All smokers and non-smokers are fully aware of the consequences. Perhaps not at the time when cigarettes first came out, but I would bet that for a good 30 years before Stuart died, this would be common knowledge.

How many smokers do you know that say “I know I could get cancer, but it will be worth it?” I think they are deluding themselves. They’re probably thinking, even if I die young, I’ve lived a good life. They’re not thinking of all the pain and suffering that comes with a cancerous death, but just because they’re not thinking about it, doesn’t mean they are ignorant. This isn’t worthy of a lawsuit.

Elaine Hess states ”It was about doing the right thing. I just really hope this can help all the thousands of families who have also suffered.” I know you’re sad at the loss of your husband. But there is nothing right about his choice to smoke in the first place. You should not be awarded for his mistake. Unless you are giving your money to the other families who have suffered this kind of loss, they are not going to benefit from this lawsuit either.

Rewarding bad behaviour is not a lesson we should teach or follow.

But since it worked for Elaine Hess, here is what I suggest we do. Smoke until your death. If you’re a non-smoker, there’s still a chance for you yet.

My husband made a good point of saying that this is the equivalent of suing a fast food chain for obesity.

So to all you hamburger loving, fatties out there. Knock yourself out. When you die, your spouse can sue a fast food chain for some big bucks. I see this as a win-win. First, you get to eat all you want and not watch your weight. Second, you die with a smile on your face AND your spouse gets to wallow in millions of dollars to wash away the pain and suffering of your loss… or her loss… whatever makes more sense.

Just go for it. This is the lesson learned. Abuse your body if it makes you happy. Your spouse will be happy with the money in your afterlife. It’s like winning the lottery for being stupid.

Thanks Elaine, I hope we all can learn the big lesson here.

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/2009/02/18/business/AP-Florida-Smokers.html?_r=3